Just DANCE -- Cuz EVERYTHING in life is SO GOOD!!!

So we're driving down the freeway on our way to meet Daddy for a picnic lunch under the B-52. (A new Friday tradition in our house that my kids just LOVE LOVE LOVE!!! And how many people can say they have picnics under a B-52? Granted, it's a retired B-52 in an outside museum, but it's still a B-52 with a stone picnic table under it's wing to provide shade from the desert sun, and THAT is just SO COOL -- ask my kids!  They BEG me to take them to see Daddy and the airplanes every time we talk about airplanes or that Daddy's at work! :-D)

Anyway -- redirect to freeway drive, center stage:

We're racing down the freeway, me in my sunglasses and pale yellow shirt, the kids in their favorite shirts and summer-time short shorts.  Our hair was being blown by the air conditioner, but we can pretend there was some windows-down coolness happening in our scenario as well! ;-D  I have one of my favorite CDs in the CD player (thank you, Emily) and come across one of my favorite songs, which is PERFECT for my life/mood lately.


And almost as soon as it comes on, Abby and Isaac BOTH start singing, "Bailar!" I look in the rear-view mirror to see them dancing away. And when it's over, they say, "Again?!?!?!!?" So I comply. Over and over again. Me just as happy as they are each and every time.

Sorry if you don't know Spanish, but here's the gist of the lyrics (my translation): Just DANCE, when everything is falling apart and you want to be somewhere else but just can't get there! Just DANCE, when everything is the same old same old and you're looking for a reason but just can't find one. Just DANCE when everything is looking down and you WANT to be better but just can't make it happen. Just DANCE when nothing really excites you more than anything else, and you just don't like what you see reflecting in the mirror! JUST DANCE . . . . You get the idea, right?

Here's the song's link.(Even if you don't speak Spanish, it's worth listening to -- you'll be up and "dancing" in no time! TRUST me!!!) And I HAVE, HAVE, HAVE to come back here and post the BEST video clip of my kids dancing and laughing and wrestling in the kitchen tonight while they waited for a VERY late dinner to finish cooking!  Kids GET how to DANCE!!!

And in the spirit of Spanish music, we found the coolest grocery store the other day. Walking through the Vallarta was like re-visiting a little piece of Latin America, one of my other true loves!!! We went for a weekly family night activity, going to buy cereal on sale, and we were just so "enamored" by it all that we walked around, and I reminisced about my mission (and all the DIFFERENCES between Chilean culture/food and Mexican culture/food). And Dave reminisced about his month-long trek through Mexico the summer before we got married. And we found their POSTRES!!! Desserts like I have NEVER seen in an American bakery but that were a dime a dozen in bakeries all over Chile. Remember how I feel about frosting on cinnamon rolls? I have, have, have to give theirs a try. I think I may have found a store-made cinnamon roll worth it's calories, with JUST the right amount of icing-on-the-cake frosting. HOWEVER, we're on a budget freeze right now so we just treated ourselves to two $.79 postres -- a bavarian cream empanada and this other thing that was like cake rolled in caramel and dipped in nuts. We were more than impressed. The kids loved it, and it's a definite MUST-DO-Family-Evening again. So simple, so rewarding, so fun!

And in the spirit of Jarabe de Palo and Latin America, I'm putting the music video for the other song on my CD that I just LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!!! Bonito. Beautiful. Basically, it's about how everything is just "beautiful" -- Everything about life is just so good!

I hope you dance . . . and I hope you smile at all the things that are going GREAT in your life!

A Little Inspiration Goes a LONG Way!!!

I thought this was awesome. So I wanted to share. To remember. To have something to look back on when I forget. Because anything is possible. If you really want it badly enough! (Except maybe choosing exactly WHEN your baby will come into the world. But that's a different story altogether!)

Date Night Box

I know I have written about this before, but I wanted to write a more detailed description of what I call the "Date Night Box."

First, the outside:

Source: http://www.katherinebley.com/live_laugh_love_scrapbook/2010/05/altered-gift-box.html

1) Go to your local dollar store (or Goodwill or garage sales or whatever) and find a box that is big enough to hold 3x5 index cards but not so big it will take up a lot of extra space and be bulky.
2) Sort through your scrapbook paper (or scraps, or go to the dollar store or another scrapbooking store) and find two complimentary designs that you think would be fitting for a Date Night Box.
3) Take off any paper, frills, etc. from your box.
4) Cut your scrapbook paper a little larger than the actual size of the box, so you can wrap the edges where needed and also cover any seams.  Combine both color schemes to completely re-cover the box (and lid) -- even the inside, if it doesn't go with your theme and/or distracts your creative eye.

Source: http://www.savedbylovecreations.com/2010/02/decorate-box-with-scrapbook-paper-and.html

5) Using a Cricut or other machine (or just printing your lettering off on the computer and putting in the extra work to do letters out of it), cut out the letters "Date Night!" - or some other catchy phrase of your choice, depending on how you talk about and look at date nights in your marriage/home.
6) Paste or use Mod Poge to put the letters on the front of the box.

You may also want to put magnets on it to put it on the refrigerator or a filing cabinet or something.  Just decide where it is going to be displayed so that it is used and not just gathering dust as a fine new piece of art.

Second, the inside:
1) Buy a pack of 3x5 index cards (colored or plain, lined or not - it's up to you).  You need at least 52 cards!
2) Decorate them to match the outside of the box, or go simple - whichever you choose.  Just make sure that whatever you do doesn't get in the way with you GETTING it done and ENJOYING the PURPOSE of the box.
3) Divide the 52 cards into four piles: one for emotional intimacy, one for intellectual intimacy, one for physical intimacy (NOT necessarily sex, but building intimacy through physical things), and one pile for spiritual intimacy.
4) Decide what your budget for the year is going to be and assign an equal number of cards in each pile a $1, $5, $10, $20, etc. so that the amounts add up to your budget limit.  (This will also help you get really creative in your ideas.)
5) Fill in the cards in each pile with an activity that will help you build/create intimacy in that particular category.  There are TONS of great date ideas out there on the web.  You just have to find them and either use them to come up with your own ideas or tweak them to fit your budget/interests.  A few that I found are here, here, here, and here.  *NOTE* -- It is really important that you do this together.  I don't know about you, but my husband and I are NOT carbon copies of each other, and we enjoy different things to different degrees.  So you want to make sure that both of you are selecting things that sound appealing and give you a good mixture of things you will enjoy and things that will stretch you together.  For example, my friend and I came up with an idea to watch an episode of a dance competition and pretend you are the couple and try to imitate the dancing/dancers.  My husband does NOT dance; I miss it more than I can express!!!  So it would be a stretch for both of us (cuz I'm not professional dance competition material), but it would still be crazy and fun and a MEMORY that wouldn't cost ANYTHING!

6) Mix the cards up.  You can do this however you choose -- color coding, shuffling so you get everything at random, picking a theme for each month on what type of intimacy you want to focus on, choosing a fixed week each month for each type of intimacy, etc.  Decide what will work best for and be fun for you!!!

That's it!!!  And covering the box, depending on how tedious/experienced you are, could take you fifteen minutes.  Filling in the cards could be a fun date night to launch all date nights.  Oh, and you might want to put a wild card in there for the week of your anniversary!!!  And if any other holidays/birthdays conflict with the night of the week you have chosen for yourselves, have a mutual understanding that it will happen the night before or the night after the holiday.  Just make sure you are both on the same page and then . . . work done, play begins!!!

P.S. - Our camera has been out of commission (broken) for a few weeks now, so I don't have pictures of my box to post.  But I did find comparable pictures on other people's sites to give you a few ideas.

Airborne Laser

Since Dave began working for the Air Force in June, he has been sitting in what they call "the cooler" waiting for his security clearance.  Yes, that's right.  He has been sitting for almost three months.  They have filled some of the time with classes on specific areas, which has sometimes been really interesting and great and sometimes just plain boring.

HOWEVER, that is all about to change because his clearance just came, and they just assigned him to a "matrix."  He will be working with the Airborne Laser.  I don't know any more about it than this short video clip (in the post below this one) explains.  But he is excited.  In his exact words, "Yeah - it will be cool, I mean I was worried they were going to have me working on cargo planes, so this is MUCH better than that!"

Yeah -- I guess it wouldn't be that cool to tell people you work on Air Force Cargo planes.  An airborne laser really DOES sound more exciting!

Other than that, he also took the GRE to start applying to grad schools.  As soon as he did, though, his "adviser" asked him what his score was, congratulated him, and told him that if his other interests don't pan out for him, they do have a few programs set up with Georgia Tech and Purdue where their engineers can earn an M.S. while taking classes on-site and save quite a bit of money (like the Air Force pays for a certain percentage of his costs, so it ends up being almost too good to pass up).

So we're still at the drawing board, trying to figure out where our priorities are, where the Lord wants and needs us, where WE want and need us, and what kinds of adventures will be best for our family in the short and long run. (And what sacrifices are worth making in the interim.) 

In the meantime, Dave was called as the First Counselor in our ward's Young Men's Presidency and I was called as the Ward Activities Chairperson.  So far, Dave has had an end-of-summer swimming party, an activity to build a spook alley for the Ward Halloween Party next month, an overnight shooting activity (combine camping and guns and you have some happy leaders -- er, I mean, young men), and they have a temple trip to the L.A. Temple next weekend.  So it has been a busy month, but he is loving every minute of it!

And I can't leave a post about Dave's life without including his 32 birthday!!!!!  And what a life to celebrate adding another year of adventures and accomplishments to!!!

He's had a great month!

And with any luck, September will wrap up with him becoming a daddy again!  This is a month to remember!

Future Weapons Airborne Laser

Run, Forrest, RUN!!!

Okay, so I've been participating in this month-long celebration of the family, which most days has really helped my attitude about my kids and my home and being a mother and a wife and everything.  In fact, I have really enjoyed it and felt uplifted and strengthened and excited about so many things!  And I've found myself researching and seeking answers and inspiration more and more, which I LOVE and miss about myself!  But today . . .

I wanted to run away and never look back!!!

I was snapping at my kids for things like them screaming at me that they just saw a fly . . . or an airplane . . . for the umpteenth time!  I mean, I can get excited with them for a while, but other than getting excited and saying, "You saw an airplane?" "Yeah!" "Wow!  That is SO COOL!" fifteen times before they stop TELLING me that they saw an AIRPLANE (or heard one, in our case, and then dashed to any window to try to spot it) is about all I can do.  I don't know what else to say!  But apparently I'm not giving them the right answer, cuz they just keep telling me over and over again . . . each time getting louder and louder, as if my lack of a correct response somehow means I didn't HEAR them correctly. (But maybe all it means is that they are enjoying having my undivided attention and riding it out for as long as they can!)

And Dear Abby does NOT take well to hearing the word no.  Again, I think she assumes that if I say no, particularly after she says, "May I please . . . ," then I must NOT have heard her or understood her.  Because no is not an acceptable response. EVER.  Like today when I was making grilled cheese sandwiches, using the LAST of the cheese, and she kept asking for a piece of cheese.

Abby: I ont cheese.
Me: I know, Abby.  And I'm making you a cheese sandwich AS WE SPEAK.  So just be patient for a minute, okay?
Abby: (looking confused, like, "Did she just actually deny me some cheese when she has it RIGHT there in her hands?) I ont cheese.
Me: Abby.  I know you want some cheese.  I'm making you a cheese sandwich RIGHT NOW, so just wait a minute.
Abby: (Starting to throw a temper tantrum and sobbing like it's the end of the world.) May . . . I . . . please . . . ave . . . some . . . cheese!
Me: Abby.  I KNOW you want some cheese, but if I give you some, I won't have enough to make you and Isaac a sandwich for lunch.
Abby: (screams at the top of her lungs at this point) I ont some cheese!!!!
Me: Abby.  Get it together.  Stop throwing a fit or go to your room until you are done.
(fit continues)
Okay, Ab -- go to your room until you are done.  I'm not listening to you throw a fit like that.  That is NOT how you get something that you want.
Abby: NO!  I ont cheese!
Me: Abigail . . . . go to your room until you can pull it together.
(I move towards her to help her get to her room.)
Abby: I pull together (and she even did stop crying for a minute).
Me: Thank you.  (I continue making the cheese sandwich.)
Abby: (starts screaming AGAIN) I ont cheese!!!!!

I think I finally distracted her with a banana.  I mean, I probably should have thought of that earlier because she was OBVIOUSLY hungry, but at the time I was just trying to make the sandwich as quickly as possible so it could cool and she could eat it and not be hungry.  So . . . .


And Isaac woke up early . . . both from his night's sleep and from his late-afternoon nap . . . and dutifully woke Abby up in turn.  Which meant I had two un-rested toddlers on my hands from 7:30 this morning on.  Which ultimately means books and movies and children's songs, a walk, a long drive in the car, or just facing the CONSTANT meltdowns.  Or sometimes all of the above . . . three or four times.  After hours of it, we finally opted for a long drive in the car!   At 4:30 in the afternoon because Dave had a late day at work and wasn't coming home at his usual time, and I had HAD it!!!

When he called and hung up and I called him back because I was SERIOUSLY DYING, even in the air-conditioned car with the twins securely tucked away in their seats and the radio playing whatever song I wanted to stop it on, he reminded me he had just gotten to the dentist for his appt. (which I had forgotten about).  I literally cried for like three miles!  Cuz I knew he also had an activity tonight with our young men's group, and that meant he wouldn't be home AT ALL until after 9:00.  And I was on my own all. night. long.  And at that point, I didn't even want to go back home.  If Abby hadn't said, "Mommy - I hungee!  I ont PIZZA!" when we drove by a fast-food place, I don't know how long I would have gone before I went back!  I mean, for some reason we were spotting a LOT of planes on those desert roads and freeways.  And that NEVER gets old for a two-year-old!


So I know I'm blessed to be a mom.  I know I'm going to look back on these days and LONG for them.  I know this is a terrific time of learning and development in their lives.  I know my role is divine and that I should love, love, love and treasure every second of it.  I know they are learning from me to keep their cool or lose it (like I did, quite a few times today).  And I know that movies and television are horrible babysitters.

And today . . . all of that went right out the window!  All I wanted was to ditch the pregnant belly, go back to December 2007, don my best tennis shoes, and RUN FOR MY LIFE!!!!!

There was this song that came on the radio while we were driving, looking at airplanes, and sobbing for miles.  "At last my love has come along.  My lonely days are over.  And life is like a song."  I thought, "Right.  My lonely days began after I found 'my love'; and I have yet to hear a song that really covers it!  Apparently she didn't know about school and work and kids and callings."

And then I thought about it some more.  And I thought, "Or maybe she did."

Maybe she knew all about it and that the hard days -- even seasons that might last a few years -- come to pass.  They are not going to last forever.  They probably won't influence the big picture nearly as much as you think they will.  You'll remember that they happened, but in the face of whatever you are currently (in the future) experiencing and enjoying, they won't seem like much.  And you will realize that even when you didn't physically get to have time together as much as you would have liked, even when you felt like the sum total of your value in life was to make sure that everyone else gets to have and do and become what they want at the expense of all the things you really want at that moment -- you were never alone because you ALWAYS had each other.  And there were enough moments where you got what you needed that you could keep going until the hard times came to pass.  And your children just added even more to that.  And their days -- good and bad -- came to pass as well, and they didn't even remember you snapped at them when they couldn't get over the airplane . . . or fly . . . or flying bug that you trapped in a bowl and finally put in the garage to die in peace (or at least give you peace in the process).  They'll just remember that you were there and that, at the end of the day, they felt secure and loved.  And they got to play in the bathtub with their toys for as long as they wanted!  And they'll even think that bathtime and our one-on-one dinner and bed times were to SPOIL them and not just mom's only solution to sanely get through the evening! ;-D

Cuz love and kids both have that one thing in common -- they're both forgiving and optimistic like that.

And tonight I started to research dates and courses for near-by half-marathons.  Just trying to get back to something that I REALLY WANT and NEED!

Power Walkin'

Today we did the most AMAZING thing: We went for a walk!  It wasn't the most amazing walk I've ever taken in my life.  The scenery wasn't quiet and serene like what you would find on the Chipman Trail on the way out the Troy Highway or up Moscow Mountain or on the way to Elk River Falls.  The weather wasn't cool and refreshing.  The sun wasn't rising or setting (not that we could have seen it through all of the houses, anyway).  But for me, it was heaven!

We walked down all the neighborhood roads, about 12 blocks to the next busy street.  And then we found a park there, tucked away from the road and the chaos.  And the kids slid down the one slide that wasn't too hot to sit on.  And they even braved the heated swings for a few minutes, just for a chance to SWING!!!  Isaac found someone's baseball in the sand, and that was HEAVEN!!!

And when it got too hot to stay there (and Abby needed her diaper changed, which we hadn't planned ahead for . . . sheesh, how long have we been parents again?), we saw a cute little ice cream cart and Dave bought the kids tubes of rainbow sorbet on a . . . whistle instead of a stick.  They LOVED it!!!  Every messy, dripping drop of it!

Top it off with a fantastic deal on some refreshing water -- 2 LARGE bottles for $1!!! -- and the afternoon was complete!

We ran across the majorly busy street (though I reminded Dave as we did that I AM nine months pregnant, after all, and hurrying to beat the oncoming traffic might NOT have been the best idea).

And as we walked down through the other neighborhoods between us and home, we TALKED!  We reminisced about past activities that we DEARLY miss and dreamed about the future -- where we want it to take us, what sacrifices (financial and otherwise) are worth it to get there, how we can create the best future for our kids while still having opportunities to push and excel ourselves.  And there were all those other unimportant topics . . . and the laughter and light-hearted banter that just isn't the same outside of the situation . . . least of all in writing.

And Abby and Isaac were in heaven!!!  Isaac took both whistles and pretended to give Abby medicine after she sneezed.  Abby played along for a while.  And then she was done and he hit her over the head with the new baseball -- and she was REALLY done!  And we "gently invited" (made) him to give her a hug and say he was sorry.  He eagerly complied (as soon as I threatened to take away the ball!).

And we promised to do it again.  Hopefully many, many, many more agains in the not-too-distant future!

Icing on the Cake

Would you like some ROLL with that FROSTING?

So I know I am probably crazy, but I have this thing with cinnamon rolls.  See, I have been disappointed by almost EVERY store-bought cinnamon roll I have ever eaten (and even some homemade ones).  Why?  It just seems like they pack on OODLES and OODLES of frosting.  Not that I'm not a fan of frosting, but it always seems to me that a cinnamon roll that can't stand on its own feet . . . that needs frosting in order to taste good (and TONS of frosting at that) . . . is just not a cinnamon roll worth eating.

The same goes for ketchup.  I mean, if whatever you are eating needs KETCHUP smothered all over it in order to TASTE good, you aren't eating a good piece of (fill in the blank).  Like a hamburger, french fries, eggs, the list goes on.

Things like frosting and ketchup (which I really could live without and never miss for even one day) are SUPPOSED to be the "icing on the cake" that ENHANCES the goodness of what is already there; not the frosting on the cinnamon rolls that HIDES what the rolls themselves are lacking.

And tonight, I kind of think that this principle applies to a LOT of things.  I'm thinking about some legislation right now that probably shouldn't have passed and was covered by WAY TOO MUCH frosting; but I might just as soon be thinking about employment, relationships, activities, education, and any other number of things.

If it's lacking in substance . . . no amount of frosting is going to change that.

You can't fix a broken marriage by spending a lot of money on expensive gifts, trips, toys, etc.  It's just empty calories going into a malnourished situation.

I was also thinking about this in terms of dating.  Mostly post-marriage. (Cuz who hasn't heard enough about dating PRE-marriage . . . or more than enough sometimes? ;-D)  Maybe even particularly for people who have been married for 10 or 15 or 30 or 50 years. (Cuz again, we all get the advice to date as newlyweds and new parents; but what happens to dating for empty- or almost-empty-nesters?)

If you want to have a happy and successful marriage, one that will more than stand the test of time (but actually EXCEL in it) and all eternity, you can't fill it with a bunch of frosting.  It's going to get old.  It's going to leave you empty and craving and longing for something more.  It's going to leave you disappointed and wishing you hadn't even taken that first bite that left you just HAVING to eat more and more, TRYING to get some sort of satisfaction out of it, but ultimately feeling DISAPPOINTED, discouraged, EMPTY.

Some advice I've been thinking about (mostly that I received or heard others receive at SOME point in my life) to avoid the frosting trap and instead have an amazing cake with JUST the right amount of ENHANCING icing:

1) NEVER stop dating!  Yes, you -- you who are in your 50s and your kids are gone and you spend a lot of time on the road being grandma or throwing yourself into work and hobbies, rarely coming together with your spouse for more than a movie or dinner in a restaurant.  Yes, YOU -- you who have been married for five years and gotten so stuck in the daily grind and living on a budget that you don't even think about dating each other any more.  NEVER NEVER NEVER stop dating!  When Dave and I got married, our dear friend and Stake President counseled us to ALWAYS remember why we fell in love to begin with, what we did during that magical time, and to make sure we never lost it!!!  That is AMAZING advice (and talking about it/reminiscing sounds like a GREAT date-night idea to me!!!).

2) Think outside of the box.  I mean, how many times can you go out to dinner or see a movie (especially TODAY'S amazing media selection) without those days soon turning into LOTS AND LOTS of frosting?  Or maybe your movie night is a game night . . . and you play games all the time, so much so that it is normal, not special or a stretch in any way.  Remember when you first started dating and you used to get really creative about asking someone out on a date and/or responding when someone asked YOU on a date (maybe it's just an Idaho/Utah thing)?  Remember how much fun it was to plan and prepare every step of the way, all the time anticipating how much THE OTHER PERSON was going to enjoy it and get a KICK out of it?  Not to mention the fact that YOU ALREADY WERE!!!  Reading a book together or having a candlelight picnic in your living room or playing the Wii or doing a workout video together can all be REALLY fun and REALLY fulfilling activities IN THEIR TURN.  You just have to make sure they aren't the EVERY DAY things that you just CALL DATE NIGHT because they are typically labeled as "date ideas."

Dave's FAMOUS Chocolate Cake (a Curry Family SECRET Recipe)

3)  Cover your bases.  I was listening to a Christian radio station a few months ago, and the pastor/preacher was talking about unity in marriage.  He said that you have to make sure you maintain and fuel your marriage intellectually, physically, spiritually, and emotionally.  If you leave any ONE of those things out (legs on a table, you might say), your marriage will dwindle (your table is going to fall over).  So if you do a lot of the SAME things, look at the big picture of what you are trying to do and become together.  And re-envision what it will take to get there.  And cover ALL of your bases.  Read a book together.  Exercise together.  Cook together.  Talk about your eternal potential and how you are going to move towards achieving it THAT VERY WEEK.  Talk.  Laugh.  Play.  Love.  Learn how to recover your furniture and do a project together.  Go to the temple together once a month.  And don't leave anything out.  Cover your bases!  Bake a cake that could stand on its own because it has the PERFECT amount of all of the necessary ingredients (but will be oh so much better with a little bit of frosting)!

4) Just DO it!  Nike has it right!  In the end, you can talk about it, plan for it, prepare for it, complain about it, listen to talks on tape about it, slander your husband to your girlfriends for not doing it, etc.  But what it all comes down to is that you have to just DO it.  Just DATE!!!  Just make time!!!  Just make it happen!  Don't get caught up in the preparations and having to find a babysitter or plan something amazingly memorable and earth-shattering.  Sometimes the simplest moments of silliness and laughter leave the most PROFOUND effects.  No excuses!  You aren't too old!  It's not for your children and grandchildren.  You're not too poor.  You're not too distanced from each other.  You're not too busy.  You just need to MAKE IT HAPPEN!!!  Today!  This week!

5) Remember it's about YOU!  Date nights aren't a time to go over the family budget or talk about the problems Jimmy is having in school or Jaime is having with her girlfriends or you are having with work or the world-at-large is having with the world-at-large.  Date nights aren't a time to schedule your week's activities or pay bills or fold laundry.  That's all another topic for another time.  (Like try a weekly companionship inventory or family council.)  Date nights ARE for you and your spouse to reconnect, rebuild, re-romance and "woo," refocus on and celbrate each other, on being a couple, on being one, on being each others sweethearts, on having fun, on walking down the SAME road in the SAME direction at the SAME speed . . . and all while holding hands, of course!  Your relationship is strictly yours.  You aren't your parents (however good or bad their relationship may have been).  You aren't that couple whose relationship you really admire or that one whose relationship you count your blessings every day that you are not stuck in!  But depending on what you do together TODAY, you will probably be ONE of those tomorrow. :-)  So decide what you want to be, what kind of a cake you want, what kind of frosting, what decorations, etc. and BECOME what you want!  But just focus on the cake -- not the entire meal, appetizers to entree to dessert.

I have some ideas, if you're interested (not because I'm good at this but because I decided TODAY, after reading this post and this post, that I AM GOING TO BE . . . so my mind is RACING around this topic right now).

That's all I've got . . . so far, anyway . . . though I reserve the right to edit/update as I go along and learn and do and become in MY reality with MY husband! ;-D

Danjewus!

This morning I came into my room to find Abby sitting on my bed with my sewing box emptied all over the bed and a pair of scissors in her hand (Dave had sewed on a button or something).  My mind IMMEDIATELY raced to all the bad-news-bear possibilities of that little detail alone.  But the look on her face was one of pain, shock, and utter disbelief all wrapped into one.

Me: (rushing for the scissors FIRST and whatever necessary damage control second) Abby!!!  No -- don't get into Mommy's sewing box!
Abby: Yeah . . . hurt (whimper as she shows me the palm of her hand and hands me the scissors) . . . danjewus!
Me: (trying hard NOT to laugh at the cuteness of it all) Yeah - that IS dangerous, huh?  So we shouldn't touch it, right?  Because we don't want Abby to get hurt!
Abby: Yeah . . . Mommy!  Danjewus!  Hurt! (which of course got a kiss on the "hurt" hand -- I couldn't see a thing -- and a huge bear hug)

Yesterday morning she woke up completely soaked through EVERYTHING, which meant an early-morning shower with Mommy.  When we got out, we had two towels I had set out: the pink-and-white-striped beach towel I got for my 26th birthday when I was working at a summer camp and a navy blue towel we got after the twins were born.  Abby is learning her colors, and without prompt from me her favorite color is pink (it's about the ONLY piece of chalk she will use when we have chalkboard coloring time)!  I have taught them the "rainbow color song." (Red and yellow and pink and green; purple and orange and blue.  I can sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow too!)  So whenever they recognize yellow or pink, they yell, "Yellow pink!" because they come together in the song.  So as soon as Abby sees the pink towel, she gets totally excited (so much so that I grab her arm because I don't want her to FALL in the tile shower) and starts yelling, "Mommy!  Yellow pink!  Yellow pink!"

Me: Is the towel pink?
Abby: (totally excited here, people -- like better than Christmas morning) YEAH!!!
Me: Yes it is. Good job!  And over there is the BLUE towel.  See, pink towel . . . blue towel.
Abby: Abby get it!
Me: (not sure I just heard my daughter CALL for the pink towel to be hers, I simply pretend I know exactly what she just meant by what she said)  Yeah.

(I dry myself off and grab the BLUE towel to wrap her in.  But she starts to protest EMPHATICALLY!)
Abby: No -- no, no, no . . . . PINK!
Me: You want the pink one?
Abby: Yeah!  Pink one Abby!

Oh the connections children make!  It never ceases to amaze (or surprise) me!!!

I am WOMAN! (And LOVE it!)

Of all the debates out there in the world today, there is one that never ceases to blow my mind.  It's that whole "equality" issue.  All of these specific groups calling for their "rights" -- and all of them centered around the argument that we all have to be equal.  And I am really starting to wonder what that even means, if we even know, or if we've gotten so used to throwing it around in the name of all things "unfair and unjust" that we have totally LOST sight of what EQUALITY really is.

I remember a conversation I had my first or second year of college.  I was talking to a fairly flamboyant and proud-of-her-feminism young woman.  As I listened to her, I wondered if she knew how hard and ridiculous she was sounding.  Finally I said something like, "Well - I don't know about all of that.  And maybe you do want to be everything a MAN is and do everything a MAN does.  But me, I DON'T REALLY WANT TO BE A MAN.  I just want to be a really strong woman!"

I've thought about that a few times since.  I mean, if I had lived during the time of Abigail Adams -- I would have been a die-hard feminist in every sense of the word for the things SHE was fighting for and felt strongly about.  The same with Jane Addams.  And Jane Austen.  Oooh -- there are so MANY amazing "feminists" in history that make me smile just thinking about them.  But by my definition of righteous feminism, I wouldn't be a feminist with Nancy Peolosi or Hillary Clinton or so many others in today's world.  In fact, I am sad that when you do a search on influential women, you find so many women listed whose lives have stood for things that I would rather NOT have had influence history.  And these women have redefined what it means to be a "woman" and what our "gender roles" should be.  Ironically, few of them have had very much time for motherhood at all.  Or they had their one token child and that was it.  They seem to have been so caught up in living lives that put them on equal ground with men -- and being the "first" woman to do what has culturally been done by men -- that they forgot to make time to do one of the things that ONLY WOMEN CAN DO.  And that's just one example! :-)

Maybe seeing some of these women and what they would try to do to and with "womanhood" in the name of equality and personal rights is what led Elder Neal A. Maxwell to wisely observe,

"When the real history
of mankind is fully disclosed,

will it feature
the echoes of gunfire or

the shaping sound of lullabies?

The great armistices made by military men or

the peacemaking of women in homes and in neighborhoods?

Will what happened in cradles and kitchens

prove to be more controlling than

what happened in congresses?"

I remember Sister Margaret D. Nadauld speaking in a General Conference  on the "Joy of Womanhood" and she said,
"Women of God can never be like women of the world. The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who are tender. There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind. There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined. We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women of faith. We have enough greed; we need more goodness. We have enough vanity; we need more virtue. We have enough popularity; we need more purity."

And lets just be honest!  To be a woman who is tender, kind, refined, filled with faith and goodness and virtue and purity -- that is NO SMALL TASK!!!  I mean, after studying Proverbs 31, I think I could work my WHOLE LIFE to just become a woman of virtue! I wonder how many women in the world spend their time thinking about and striving to become these things.   


This has since become one of my favorite quotes!  Not only does it provide an AWESOME example of PROFOUND alliteration, but it also provides an AWESOME standard for where women of today have to FIGHT to get back to because of the direction some of the women of yesterday have taken in the name of "gender equality."

When I was majoring in Creative Writing at Southern Virginia University, I wrote this poem:

As society seeks to build

Strong Women,

I fear I will

have to Be Stronger

to Be a Mother

not only to my own children but

to my

Neighborhood,

Country,

World.

I am grateful I am a woman!  I am grateful that I have things I CAN do and MUST do that men will NEVER be able to do!  I am grateful that my husband is a man.  I am grateful that he has things that he CAN do and MUST do that I will NEVER be able to do!  And I am grateful that I get to learn even MORE about strength in gender as I mother my children and learn and grow from their DIFFERENCES every day!

The Happiness Leak . . .

"Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ."
The Family: A Proclamation to the World

Doesn't this picture just FILL you up with HAPPINESS (and these aren't even YOUR crazy kids)?!?!?!?!!? I mean, look at the looks on their faces, the absolute joy, the complete lack of any inhibition. The laughter that comes from deep down in their bellies, the kind you can't help but let out -- no matter how silly or annoying or obnoxious it might sound to other people.  You can feel that they just HAVE TO LAUGH because they are JUST THAT HAPPY! My kids experience it and pull it out of me EVERY DAY! They KNOW happiness!

But you don't get this out of adults as much as you get it from kids. Why is that?

I especially notice this in big cities -- like when I visited Chicago while presenting at a national conference a few years ago. No one looked up -- everyone rushed to and fro on the busy sidewalks, trying to get where they were headed as quickly as possible. And heaven help you if you accidentally bumped into one of them and detained them for even a moment from their course. No one was smiling. No one was talking with their friends or casually making eye contact with, saying hello to, and smiling at the people passing them by.

If you haven't read The Pig of Happiness, I HIGHLY recommend it!!! HIGHLY! My dear friend, Emily, gave it to me for Christmas after the twins were born, and I LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!!!

It's about a pig, a pig that is completely ordinary -- EXCEPT that this pig HATES the mumbling and grumbling that is so naturally the way with other pigs. SO the pig decides to change it!

"I know," thought the pig. "I shall become an EXTRAORDINARY pig! From now on I shall stand for everything that is LIGHT and BEAUTIFUL and TRUE and WONDERFUL. I shall see the BEST in EVERYONE and the BEST in EVERYTHING! I shall become the PIG OF HAPPINESS!"

And the pig DID . . . to the point that the happiness eventually (in a few short pages) seaped out from inside of the pig and was absorbed and reflected by others around it . . . and THEY became happy, too!

And so it goes when we follow Christ! We stand for everything that is LIGHT and BEAUTIFUL and TRUE and WONDERFUL and denounce everything that isn't. And then, we see others as children of God, see the BEST in EVERYONE and the BEST in EVERYTHING!!! And we are HAPPY! Truly HAPPY! And then that happiness spreads . . . it spreads to our children, to our neighborhoods, to our workplaces, to our schools, to our world. Just one bold denouncement of "evil" in all its forms at a time.

Imagine that deep-down-in-the-belly, genuine laughter of happiness echoing all over the streets of this crazy world! Hey -- it could happen!

Cookie Monsters . . .

Yesterday Dave had the BRILLIANT idea that he wanted to make cookies with the kids.  So that's what we did tonight!  And it was SUPER cute and really fun to watch them dump the dough onto the pans.  And what cookie experience would be complete without a round or two of eating the dough and licking the bowl clean?  Not a Chaffee family experience, that's for sure!!! (Pictures to follow -- as soon as I can get to a computer that will let me download, view, and upload them.)

Lesson Learned . . .

I am definitely feeling grateful today.  I'm thankful that my husband FINALLY cleaned up the garage and put all the empty cardboard boxes we've been unpacking up on the garage beams and out of the way!!!!

I'm VERY thankful that I woke up this morning to two dead cockroaches in my entry-way!  Hey -- that sure beats the four live ones I've found other mornings and killed this week!  Looks like the spray is WORKING!!!!

And I am incredibly THANKFUL that I learned a valuable lesson.  Yesterday, I put the twins down for a nap and went to take a shower.  Without realizing that one of them had turned the dial on the stove and turned on the GAS.  Oh, yes!  Which would have been one thing if my trek to the shower had been just a normal trek.  But it was interrupted by a few things, and then by a screaming Abby who decided to cut her nap VERY SHORT and . . . so I could still GET that shower . . . subsequently got a shower with Mommy while Isaac finished his nap. 

As we emerged from the shower and came out into the living room to get Abby dressed, I was amazed to turn the corner in the hallway to be nearly knocked off my rocker by the smell of gas.  I immediately went to the kitchen and saw the dial that had been turned to HIGH and turned it off.  Then I did what any uninformed, well-intentioned mother would do.  I got the most powerful air purifiers from our purifier-filled house and moved them into the kitchen and entry way.  And I turned them on high.  

In the meantime, Isaac woke from his nap; and they both wanted to watch the "frog movie" -- The Letter Factory Alphabet Movie.  So I decided we needed out of the house as soon as possible and put them in front of the t.v. while I ran back to finish getting dressed and get out of that house.  But I stopped dead in my tracks as I remembered that Dave had the car, and we were pretty much stuck. 

By this time, I mused, the smell was already subsiding a LOT, so maybe it would be okay if we just waited it out.  And we did.  And it was.

And then Dave came home and told me -- oh wise Electrical Engineer that he is -- that I had done the WORST possible thing you could do in that situation!  Huh?  Well, apparently the air purifiers don't clean gas out of the air (though it sure appeared to me that they were doing a fine job!).  No -- because gas is a chemical or something or other and can't be cleaned OUT of the air like dust or pollen or whatever. 

In fact, the electrial currents from the purifiers COULD HAVE CAUGHT ON FIRE from the gas and BLOWN UP OUR ENTIRE HOUSE!!!  Wow.  That's kind of a bigger deal than I thought.  And then he informed me that even using my small cell phone could have caused the same reaction and that the BEST thing to do in a situation like that . . . should one unfortunately occur again . . . is open the windows and leave the house immediately!!!

So now you know.  Just in case you ever find yourself with a gas-filled room because some curious toddler turned the dial on the stovetop.  Or for whatever other myriad of reasons might leave you caught in a similar situation.

I Am A Child of God

I read my friend Carrie's post on one line in The Family: A Proclamation to the World, and it reminded me of something I don't think I've recorded anywhere yet.  So here's the PERFECT opportunity!

My mom had told me for as long as I could remember that I would only be able to go to college if I got scholarships, because neither she nor my dad would ever be able to help me financially.  She also taught me that I should follow the Lord's counsel, as given through His holy prophets, and stay out of debt.  I think it went something like, "Marriage is hard enough without you placing your educational debts on your husband's back to have to pay off someday."  So, I did everything I could to get good grades, make myself a well-rounded individual through community service and school leadership opportunities, and then I applied to schools. 

The first year was completely paid for!  I don't remember even having to get a job that year. 

The second, however, was a different story.  I remember spending the summer before applying for every scholarship I could find.  And I worked three jobs -- one at a local laundry mat, one as a tutor in the Reading Lab, and one on the weekends in a hotel.  As the beginning of the school year neared, I was still short $1,500 -- and that was WITH me budgeting in work at two of the three jobs throughout the school year. 

About three weeks before school started, I was talking to my mom, telling her I didn't know what else I could do.  I had paid my tithing and done everything I could, but I was still short.  And I hadn't heard back from my school about a few scholarships I had applied for.  So she suggested I call them and see if they had made any decisions or could tell me when they might have a decision made on their scholarships and go from there. 

I did.  And after putting me on hold to look at my file, the woman came back and said, "I don't know what happened, but we have a leadership award for you for $1,500 that we've been waiting to hear back from you on whether you accept it or not.  I guess you didn't get the award letter yet.  I'll put another one in the mail today.  Be sure to send your acceptance back as soon as possible so we don't assume you don't want it and award it to someone else."  Wow!  A scholarship in the EXACT amount that I had been short.  And I knelt and said a prayer of thanks before I went and told my mom what had happened.  Heavenly Father knew who I was and what my situation and desires were, and He had responded accordingly. 

Fast forward eight years and many, many more experiences like this one.  After finishing my B.A. and M.A. single and entering the workforce, I realized that I had met the man of my dreams and decided (after two years of being friends and dating) to marry him.  We felt right about each other, right about our decision, and right about the date we had chosen -- December 15. 

There was just one glitch: He had been married before, and we needed clearance from the First Presidency to be sealed together for time and all eternity in a Temple of the Lord.  NOT getting married in the Temple was NOT an option.  It just wasn't.  So we did everything we needed to do and submitted our request in early October. 

And then we waited.  And our date neared.  And we waited.  And our families started to wonder if we were having a wedding or not.  And we waited.  And our invitations sat, stamped and addressed, but not quite ready to mail yet.  And we waited.  The holidays neared, and we began to wonder if the fairly new First Presidency would be meeting regularly or taking breaks that would detain them from receiving and responding to what I could only imagine were mass amounts of mail from members all over the world. 

So, we fasted and prayed the first weekend in November that the First Presidency would receive our appeal before Thanksgiving, before they might be separating for the holidays, and we would hear back in time to get everything pulled together for our wedding.

Through all of this, many people cast doubts in our way, telling us stories of couples that had waited six months to a year before they got clearance, of couples in our area that were still waiting.  Someone even told me that they had only heard of one case that was faster -- the nephew of one of the prophets had gotten clearance in a few months; but HE, of course, had connections. 

For a moment, I was discouraged.  But then the thought came clearly into my mind, "Melinda - who was HE and who are you?  He wasn't the nephew of a prophet; he was a son of God.  And YOU are a daughter of God.  The only person whose connections you need, you already have."  So I prayed again that Heavenly Father would put His hand in our situation and make sure our appeal reached the First Presideny's desks and whisper in the prophet's ears that we needed to get married December 15.  And if it wasn't too much trouble, I asked that He pull everything together before Thanksgiving.  Talk about specific . . . and BOLD!!! ;-D

I had a bridal shower after Thanksgiving, and we still had not heard anything from the First Presidency.  In fact, the night before my shower, Dave finally gave me my ring on a rose -- the closest thing to a proposal I got from him.  (He said he had been waiting for the letter, but he wanted me to have my ring for my bridal shower.) 

That evening as I was closing at work, Dave came and knocked on the glass door.  I was so surprised to see him!  He had been at Drill all day and had a night with the boys planned.  I opened the door, and he just waved an envelope in front of me.  I screamed, hugged him, and we opened it together, tears in our eyes (though he'd deny it to his DEATH), our hearts overflowing!  We said a prayer of thanks and then proceeded to call the Temple and schedule a date and call our families and friends and let them know we could move ahead with everything. 

Later, when I was looking at the letter and just feeling over and over again how thankful I was, I was struck by the date.  It had been signed two days before Thanksgiving.  It had just taken a little longer, with the holidays, to get TO us.  But our prayers had truly been answered in every detail!  And we were sealed for time and all eternity just two weeks later!

I am a daughter of God.  You are a child of God.  There is nothing more or less exceptional about me than that -- certainly nothing that would make me an exception in receiving specific and miraculous blessings from God that others could not also receive!

One of my favorite scriptures is found in Romans, Chapter 8: 16-17 --

"The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that
we are the children of God: 

And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and
joint-heirs with Christ;

if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also
glorified together."

I need to do better at remembering all of this!

God's Family . . . My Family

I don't know if you've noticed or not, but I am celebrating FAMILY this month with some other fantabulous bloggers in the virtual world of the internet . . . and the anniversary of The Family: A Proclamation to the World.  Today's focus is on the fact that Family is CENTRAL to God's Plan of Happiness.  And He is central to OUR happiness.  Check out this post.  And now, my two bits (cuz you may have noticed that I ALWAYS have SOMETHING to say! ;-D):

This is actually really good for me to remember today.  There are a few things that I have had to work really hard for in my life -- MOTHERHOOD is at the TOP of that list.  Marriage is another.  Then there are those daily, weekly, hourly things that pop up and you deal with or simply put out of your mind for sanity's sake because you know you do not have and will not get answers right away, so there's no point dwelling on and worrying about them.  My friend Kristen once reminded me that "worrying does not empty tomorrow of it's troubles, it empties today of its strengths."  I try, TRY, try, T-R-Y to remember that. 

But of all the things that I have had to work hard for, work hard to achieve, to learn, to understand, to overcome, etc., there is one thing that has always been a part of me, always been so obvious and so real to me:  It is my knowledge that I am a daughter of God and that He loves me -- and my commitment to do anything to please Him and to make it back to His presence again some day.  I may not always remember this from day to day as I struggle along down the path of life, but I do ALWAYS -- and I mean always -- KNOW it! 

One of my favorite scriptures is where God is speaking to Moses and says, "For behold, this is my WORK and my GLORY -- to bring to pass the IMMORTALITY and ETERNAL LIFE of man."

Imagine that! I mean, really imagine it!  I'm an English major -- TWICE, crazy me -- and I know how important diction is to get your meaning across.  And God uses the words WORK and GLORY together.  What comes to mind when you think about, try to envision, the GLORY of God?  Words cannot express or describe, right?  And yet with all of that, He tells us that WE are His GLORY!!!  That our success . . . our receiving immortality and eternal life . . . is HIS life's GREAT WORK and is what brings Him His GLORY!!!  And can you see God WORKING on anything that isn't a SUCCESS?  I mean, He is GOD, after all -- and if He's working on it, He has ALL resources at His fingertips to make it a reality -- the GREATEST of which is the Atonement of Jesus Christ!

Now hopefully you won't feel so small today!

And when I think about my family, I realize that if that is what He is doing for me, that is what He is doing for my children -- HIS children. 

How is the FAMILY central to God's Plan of Happiness?  We are all the Family of God!  Individual families are just off-shoots, but collectively we ARE the children and FAMILY of God.  Nothing comes before or after that fact!  It's really ALL about family.  And HIS goal is to have HIS family -- every single one of His precious children -- back in His presence one day.  One HUGE and HAPPY family reunion!  (Who would want to miss THAT one?) 

And if I can hold onto THAT as I work to raise and rear and care for my off-shoot of God's family -- my branch of His marvelous Family Tree -- I can't help but know that HE is in it!  And after all I can do -- even all my mistakes and short-comings, try as I may -- HE will make up the difference for HIS children and make sure that THEIR needs are met so that they CAN return to Him.  Hard as it may be to imagine, He wants more for them than I do.  And He is much, much more capable of making that a REALITY than I will ever be!

You, too, by the way!  He's working for YOU today -- for YOUR success and happiness!  So, get to it! ;-D

My Love Hate Relationship . . .

Food.  Yes, that's right.  And you are probably thinking that you know EXACTLY what I mean.  But let me expound, cuz you might be surprised.

See, since we came to California, I have developed an incredible disdain for all things food! 

I hate mealtime -- hate, hate, hate it!  Mealtime around here consists of me sitting at the table for . . . sometimes an hour and a half . . . trying to get my twins to eat something . . . anything . . . just a few bites . . . no, no, focus, yes, I know there's a fly on the table, and that is STILL a bird out the window . . . no, we aren't eating (____), we are eating THIS right now . . . Daddy isn't here . . . yep, he's at work . . . you don't need milk right now because then you won't eat anything, so just take a bite . . . ooh, that IS an airplane, yes very cool, but . . . wait, stop, don't hit her . . . we do NOT throw food on the floor . . . please just sit down and EAT!!!

Three or four or five or six times a day.  Depends on the day.  And what I'm eating/what my food schedule is.

Add in heartburn, stage left.  I don't remember having heartburn this bad the last time around . . . or this frequently!  I basically LIVE on tum, tum, tum, tum . . . . TUMS!!!!  Extra strength, sugar free -- thanks, Dave!!!  I don't get through the night without them.  And it seems whenever I try to eat to feed the heartburn with something besides antacids, it just makes things worse!

Add in Dave's summer diet, stage right.  I love that he is getting into his diet, and I am so proud of him.  He has had a tough last few years, and we plan on growing old together VERY GRACEFULLY!  But it's been hard to find things that he can/should eat and the twins WILL eat (albeit with much prodding) and my body won't completely turn on me if I eat.  So preparing for mealtime is almost as exhausting as mealtime itself.

And somehow in the midst of all of that, I have developed this inability to eat!  Like I have to force myself to eat things (even things that are horrible for me that I SHOULD be craving . . . like cinnamon rolls, for example).  And most of the time, I finish and feel really nautious, wishing I hadn't indulged for even a second.

The things that have managed to escape the "odiousness" list are a whole wheat english muffin with an egg on it (just salt and pepper, nothing else, please!), sugar-free root beer floats, lightly-sweetened rice pudding (made with brown rice), oatmeal . . . and right now, that's really all that comes to mind when I try to think of something I enjoy eating.

Add in nights like tonight -- when my kids (Isaac), who have not eaten all day, even though they have taken PLENTY of mom's time and energy stores to NOT do it, wake up at midnight, sobbing like they have just had their hearts wripped out because . . . "I hungee!  Cee-wee-al!  Momma!  Ceeweeal!  Hungee . . . hungee (sob, sob, sob)!"

And I get them (Isaac) cereal . . . still going through much of the same routine . . . cursing the day and the things I couldn't get them to touch with a ten-foot pole . . . and wishing I had bought more Quaker Oatmeal Squares last week when they were on sale because I can't afford them at regular price and my kids . . . well, they are LOVIN' THEM SOME OATMEAL SQUARES CEREAL . . . even at midnight!

Oh food that I used to LOVE and struggled to walk away from, when will this HATE subside so we can have a RELATIONSHIP again?  Cuz to be perfectly honest, I don't know how many more days of THIS NONSENSE I can handle.

Wanted: Advice!

So we are in our last month of pregnancy.  And, as usual, the thing weighing the most on my mind is my twins and how this is all going to work for them.  I can kind of remember the things I struggled with the most when I brought my babies home from the hospital, and many of those things will be diminished or non-existant with one baby instead of two.  HOWEVER, a newborn is still a newborn.  And toddlers will be toddlers.  So many of the "I wish I would have . . . ." things I have read and rememberd are pretty much null and void because I realize I WILL have two OTHER children still.  And I won't, for example, be resting when the baby rests because the two-year-olds DON'T do rests but once a day, sometimes not at the same time, despite my best efforts, and for periods from 30 minutes to an hour and a half. (I haven't been lucky enough to have kids that take one two-to-three hour nap in the afternoon . . . EVERY afternoon!  Bless you who do!!!  I can't imagine how that ONE THING would completely change my LIFE!!!)

So for those of you wise sages out there who have been down the road of bringing a newborn home when you have a toddler (or two) waiting for you to come back and just be Mommy, what advice do you have for me?

Some things I've thought about:
* I'm making schedules up for anyone (Daddy, Grandma) that comes so the twins will still have some sort of routine -- eating routine, bedtime routine, morning routine, etc.
* I'm making a menu for the first month (or two, if I can) and hope to have freezer meals for a lot of it.  I even thought today that I might ask if any sisters in my Relief Society would mind putting together freezer meals if I get them recipes and all of the ingredients, cuz let's face it - I still don't have a TON of time on my hands right now to be spending in the kitchen!!!
* I've stocked up on diapers and wet wipes for newborn AND toddlers that will keep up from going to the store for the essentials -- nope, didn't do the environmental thing of cloth diapers with the twins, and now I have lost all desire I may have once had to do so!  No offense!
* I'm planning a Spring Cleaning of the entire house over the next few weeks -- Daddy included, of course! :-)
* I've stocked up on shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste, cleaning supplies, stain remover (for clothes), laundry detergent, toilet paper, and dishwashing detergent -- again, so we don't have to worry about going to the store for the "essentials" when we're so tired that we don't even want to leave the house!
* I'm trying to put together a list of activities to do with the kids every day -- to break up the monotony and help them feel like they are having special times and memories with grandmas and daddy and mommy along with the baby.

What else?  What am I not remembering or not thinking about here?  What are the things that you did or someone did for you that SAVED you?  What do you wish you had done the second time around but didn't learn until the third time around? 

Fortunately, we have a lot of room here in our California rental, so everything is pretty easily organized, though there are a few boxes we still need to get through and we are considering having a yard sale before the baby arrives.  However, that might just be one of those things that can -- of necessity -- wait.  I have also given up on the idea of getting all my unfinished project finished.  Just not in the cards right now.

So share, please!!!  And no, I don't have a decorated room all ready and haven't decided yet if I need to split the twins up into their own rooms or what.  We have a diaper changing table, we have a pack and play, and we have a bassinett -- all courtesy of garage sales and Craigs List.  And that is about all the "new" stuff we have.  Though I am going to buy that one new outfit and also plan on making her a flannel blanket. :-)

What's in a Name?

Well, for us, a lot actually.  We put a lot into naming our children.  Though Dave tells me I mis-remember the experience of naming Isaac and Abigail (I think we both mis-remember a bit, if you want to know the truth), I don't remember it being that hard.  It just kind of clicked.  They were some of the first names we talked about, and even when we didn't know we were having a boy and a girl and were trying to come up with another girl and another boy name, just in case, Abigail and Isaac were always on the table. 

And we try to pick significant names.  One of the things we want to do is buy our children books about famous/influential people with their same names . . . . kind of a heritage library, if you will.  Abigail, besides being a great Biblical woman, is also the name of Abigail Adams -- one of my historical faves! -- and the mother of Brigham Young -- Dave's FAVORITE prophet ever.  Marie is my middle name, my mom's middle name, my grandpa's sister's name, etc.  Essentially, it's a family name.  So it just fits.  Isaac has a similar legacy.  There are Isaac from the Bible and Sir Isaac Newton (THE greatest scientist of ALL time if you ask David).  His middle name is David, after his dad.  So he got the religious/scientific/family name combination while Abby got the religious/historical/family name combination.

If this baby were a boy, he would be named either Benjamin or Porter Thomas.  Benjamin after Benjamin in the Bible and Benjamin Franklin, Thomas after my dad, Thomas Edison (the second GREATEST), Thomas Jefferson, and a host of men in the Chaffee family tree.  Porter is a family surname, but it is also after Porter Rockwell, Dave's OTHER favorite man from history. 

But it's a girl . . . .

And we're kind of stuck. 

I love Emma and Isabella (Queen Isabella from Spain who funded Christopher Columbus' voyage, though I'm not sure there are any books about her that paint her as an upstanding namesake), Miriam, Eleanor (Eleanor Roosevelt) and all of his sister's names (which his mom already took from the Bible, so we don't get them).  I also like Eliza, which is my grandma's middle name (but is also his sister's nickname).  I also have a dear friend named Mercedes, called Sadie for short -- and I LOVE that -- so dang cute! -- but it goes away from the influential woman or family connection factor.  Not that she isn't an AMAZING woman, but you get the idea.  And Dave doesn't really like Mercedes -- too much to name a child after a city or car or something like that.

And David likes Dagny -- from Atlas Shrugged. Enough said.

The middle name is easy - Jane (or Jayne, depending on our mood and how un-traditional we are feeling).  That is after Jane Addams -- perhaps my MOST favorite woman from history -- and Jane Austen.  But I think Jane as a first name is so plain.  Jane Chaffee.  It just doesn't speak to me.  But since it is already a great name for historical/influential woman purposes, it leaves us a bit more open on the first name. 

I saw the name Samantha Grace today and really liked it.  But his sister is naming her daughter Katherine Grace or Grace Katherine.  I don't remember which.  But Dave will NOT repeat family names. Period. 
So, friends, I need some help here!  Though Emma appears left and right throughout Dave's family history, he's kind of boycotted it.  For like forever.

So who are some famous/influential women from your lives?  They may have historical, religious, scientific, etc. influence.  But they definitely need to be role models of some sort, to continue our pending tradition of having a namesake library for each of our kids and adding to it their own stories as they grow and develop.